Thursday January 21, 2010

Every day feels like a roller coaster. Today was no exception. Ashley woke up feeling better than she did yesterday. Her face was not as swollen. Her eyes looked a little brighter. She wanted to come out into the living room for a while, which she did. It was nice to see her be out of the bedroom. The sun was so bright today. It brightened my spirit. I don't think Ashley could help but feel the warmth in her heart too. (0:

Throughout the morning, she did well. Her nausea completely subsided, and she asked for food. The PLE , (protein losing enteropathy), attacked her with a vengence. Everything she ate went straight through her. The diarrhea was a huge problem all day long. She was hungry, and felt like eating, but had a hard time doing so because as soon as she did, she had to run to the bathroom. (Okay, she can't run, but you get my meaning! When you gotta go, you gotta go!) I have no idea what we can do for the PLE. There is not much to stop the diarrhea. Believe me, we have tried everything. It is a matter to certainly pray about. The only help she will get for this problem, will come from her Heavenly Father.

As far as her pain level, she did excellent. Her back and arm did not bother her. In the afternoon, and throughout the evening, her stomach was awful. Her poor bottom is sore from going to the bathroom so much. I did help her take a shower tonight to help with the soreness. Oh how exhausting that is for her! As soon as I had her washed and dressed, she fell asleep. I knew she would. She told me, even with the exhaustion, it felt so good to wash and soak her sore places in the warm water. I was glad I could offer her a little comfort.

Tonight, when she woke from her nap, she was hungry. We thought and thought and thought about what she might attempt to eat. She finally agreed on potatoes and gravy. She ate an entire bowl, which was miraculous! But in a matter of minutes, she was on the potty again. But at least she was able to have a little bite of food in her belly. My poor angel!

At the moment, she is very sleepy. Her speech is slurred, but I know it is from the pain medication and the ativan. I do feel she is at peace. She and I have talked extensively about Heavenly Father's plan for her. She was so concerned today that she had offended her Father in Heaven by praying so many times to die. She told me she understands that her life is in His hands. She is ready to go at any time, but she will trust in her Eternal Father. He will take her home when it is the right time and He will take care of her until that time. I am so thankful for her faith! She is such a strong young lady and I tell her how proud of her I am every chance I get.

One day at a time. One hour at a time. Constant prayers. Unwavering faith. That is our formula for survival. Thank goodness for the gospel of Jesus Christ, for the plan of salvation, which constantly reminds us of our purpose on earth, of where we came from, why we are here, and where we are going. I would be lost without it!!